Life After Mortal Kombat
by Ghost Zero
Summary: What happens when Midway drops the axe on Mortal Kombat and all its stars? How will the fighters survive? Rating for some language and situations. Please R&R! Complete!
1. Firings and Commercials

Disclaimer: I don't own Mortal Kombat, The Apprentice, Midway, nor do I own the name Ed Boon. Furthermore, ESPN and the Los Angeles Clippers are not mine either.

The scene is the Midaway offices. All the kombatants from Ashrah to Sub-Zero were the offices of Ed Boon, the head of all the Mortal Kombat games and the guy that signs thier checks. After about an hour, Ed boon and two of his aides walked in.

Ed Boon: All right guys, I know your all wondering why you were brought here, so I'll tell you. Recently, one of Midway's higher ups named Joe Notimportanttothestrory died

Kung Lao: That guy who slept with Kabal's sister died?

Ed Boon: Yes it was horrible. They found him in his home without limbs and hook wounds in his chest. They also found this letter.

The letter they found on Joe read FEAR THE BLACK DRAGON!

Everyone in room then looked at Kabal

Kabal: What? I was watching a Raider's game when it happened.

Sonya: How did you know when it happended?

Kabal:...

Ed Boon: Anyway, as I was saying. The CEO of the company has chosen me to take Joe's job.

Fujin: You called us here for that?

Boon: Not quite. You see as you all know the sales for Deadly Alliance and Deception were not as high as expected.

Reiko: So what?

Boon: With the sales and me getting promoted, they've decided to shut Mortal Kombat down. And well...I don't know how to say this so I asked someone else to say is for me. Come in Donald.

The theme music for The Apprentice plays and Donald Trump enters the room.

Trump: Kombatants, you have not been performing up to par, and that's not esceptable. So Kombatants, (does hand gesture) You're fired.

All:WHAT!

Kung Lao was histerical, Dairou started running in circles screaming, and Havik jumped out a nearby window

Raiden: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! How am I going to pay of my gambling debts?(realizes everyone's looking at him) What? Gods can gamble.

Liu Kang: Oooookay.What about our contracts?

Boon: Ripped up.

Rain: You can't be serious. I have bills to pay!

Boon: Not my problem.

Sub-Zero: Even after all we've been threw?

Trump: Why are you all still here? I fired you.

After he said this Reptile jumped on him and ate his head.

Reptile: (burps)

Nitara: Thank you babe.(tounges Reptile down)

Everyone Else:(vomits)

Scorpian slowly approached Boon

Boon: Please don't kill me! I'm so sorry! I didn't have a choice!

Scopian got so close to Boon that he could smell the Brimstone on the ninja spectrre.

Scorpian: Where's are our last checks?

Boon: At the front desk.

Scorpian left the room and went to retrieve his check. After the other Kombatants cussed, flipped off, threatened(in Kobra's case kicking him in his nuts) and yelled at Boon they all left to obtain they're checks.After they finished, they all said they're goodbyes(Bo Rai Cho cried at the thought of never seeing Li Mei's clevege again) and went to start new lives.

4 months later

Johnny Cage sat in his living room, flipping threw the channels on his big screen T.V. He let it stay on ESPN to catch the score of the Clippers game. A commercial came on. It had Liu Kang, Kung Lao, Shujinko, Kai, and Bo Rai Cho on it.

Liu Kang: Have you ever wanted to be a Shaolin Monk?

Shujinko: Well here's your chance!

Kai: By joining the Wu Shi Academy for Shaolin Monks

Bo Rai Cho: All you need to do is send in 10 payments of $99.99.

Kung Lao: And here's one of those testimonial things!

The screen flips to Kai wearing a wig and different cloths with a really fake beard

Kai:(speaking as if he is reading of a cue card) I was just a geek until I called the Shaolin Monks and joined them now I'm the baddest muthafucka around. Thanks Shaolin Monks.

Liu Kang: There you have it! You can go from weakling to warrior to in no time.

Kung Lao: And as you can tell from my comrades we don't discrimnate against blacks, drunks, old people, fat guys, ugly people, idiots, dumb people who would rather be a monk than live with a hot princess, and people who get deceived by former emperoers of Outworld

Everyone else then gave Kung Lao violent glare.

Kung Lao: What?

Kai: Appartently we don't discrimiant against people who where ugly hats and are only considered cool because thier anscestor won Mortal Kombat years ago.

Shujinko: Anyway, like he said all are welcome.

All 5: So join the Shaolin Monks Today!

The commercial then ends.

Johnny decided not to think about the commercial he had just seen and walked out the door to the set of his new movie.

A/N: Well that's chapter 1! Hope you liked it! Please R&R! Be as harsh as you see fit.


	2. Pornos and Pain for Kenshi

Disclamer: I own nothing. Not even the computer I'm typing this story on.

Jax, Cyrax, and Sryker all sat behind thier desks in Special Forces headquarters. It was weird. They all got into thier occupations to avoid a boring life, but now that there was no more Mortal Kombat everything just seemed, well boring.

"I am so bored!" Jax exclaimed

"Affirmative. I have similar feelings of boredom." Cyrax said

A devilish grin made it too Stryker's face "I know something exciting we could do."

"What?" Jax and Cyrax said in unison

Stryker looked around to make sure no one was looking "We could watch this piping hot brand new porn!"

"Sounds good to me!" Jax said

Kenshi then enters the room eating a huge sub sandwich.

"Sup guys?" Kenshi said as he took a bite into the sandwich

Jax then began bouncing up and down like a small child getting ready to go to the toy store "We're about to watch porn!"

"Really?" Kenshi asked

"Affirmative." Cyrax chimed

Kenshi bit the sandwich again "Wow. It's times like this I wish I could see".

"WHO ATE MY DAMN SUB?!" Sonya's yelling could be heard in the distance

Cyrax, Stryker and Jax look ate Kenshi.

"You didn't. Did you?" Jax asked

Kenshi ate the last bit of the sandwich. "Maybe I did. Maybe I didn't"

Cyrax then began beeping "Chances of Lt. Blade beating your skull in with Kali Sticks: 100 Chances of you escaping: 0"

"Why is she so mad?" Kenshi asked nervously "It wasn't even marked!"

Jax rolled his eyes "How would you know? You're blind!"

"Oh yeah".

Just then Sonya burst into the room

Sonya instatly notices the mustard on Kenshi's lip "YOU! YOU WILL DIE FOR EATING MY SANDWICH!!"

"Run blind man! Run to the ends of the Earth!" Jax screamed

Kenshi then screamed like a girl a ran as fast he could. Sonya then gave chase with the before mentioned Kali Sticks.

"...Okay. Let's start the flick!" Stryker said, rubbing his hands together.

He handed the DVD to Cyrax who then put it in a slot on his arm. His chest then open up and a projectile started playing the movie. Before the movie began, a trailer for another porn began.

"The future of gay porn is here!" the announcer said

"What the hell?" a confused Jax said

The announcer continued "Sex Slam Entertainment presents: Love Crime! Featuring rising stars Jarek Jackoff and Snakelike K.!"

The screen then shows Jarek and Kobra dressed like bank robbers after a heist.

"Dammit! You fucked up again!" Kobra said

"I'm sorry. During the heist I looked at you and got so hot" Jarek said

"Well I guess I have to punish you" Kobra said

"Really?" Jarek asked

Kobra then pushed Jarek against the wall "You bet your sweet ass"

Just as they are about to kiss, Cyrax shot out the disc and destroyed it with a rocket

Jax began screamig "WHY? WHY? WHY GOD WHY?"

Stryker was frozen in shock

"That was...Sickening" Cyrax said

"Guys?" Stryker said. "We tell no one about this incident"

"Agreed." the other two said in unison

For the remainder of the day, Jax, Stryker, and Cyrax sat in silence while Kenshi ran from Sonya.

A/N: Another chapter done! Hope everyone liked it.


	3. Psychic Readings and Baby Daddys

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

Johnny walked on the studio lot, struggling to find which set was his. Something told him he should have written it down. He would have to find his set the old fashioned way: trying them all. He check studio A. A shampoo commercial. Studio B was movie called "The Savage". He sighed at the fact that he passed on that role

A/N: How cheesy is a movie where Johnny Cage won't do it? He did Ninja Mime dammit!

Studio C was a porno that had two guys who looked like Kobra and Jarek touching each other. He shivered at the thought and wandered into the next studio where he found Emac. He had a lot of beeds on his body and candles burning. He had black dreds coming out the top of his mask and his mask was the color of the Jamacan beeds.

Announcer: And now get ready for Psychic readings by Ermac! Live!

Erac:(in Jamaican accent) Greetings! We are Mr. Ermac! Call us now for your free reading! Witness the psychic power of Ermac

Female caller 1:(In a trailer park accent that would put any hillbilly to shame) Mr. Ermac? I needs to know, will I ever hit the lottery and move to Hollywood?

Ermac: You currently live a trailer park right?

Female caller 1: Yes.

Ermac: A disgusting place?

Female caller 1:Yes!

Ermac: Where the rats outnumber the people 400 to one?

Female caller 1: Yes! Yes!

Ermac: You will die there.

Female caller 1: Oookay.Well if I'm gonna be here till I die, will my husband get a higher paying job at least?

Ermac: Are you refering to Grady, the drunk mechanic?

Female caller 1: Yes

Ermac: He's the one that kills you.

Female caller 1:...(crys)

Ermac:(in an evil tone) Your session has ended! Next caller!

Female caller 2:(in the most ghetto accent imaginable) Um yea Mista Ermac I need ta kno who my baby daddy be so I can get me some money and feed her.(Yelling at her kids) Bonificaca! Get yo ass of dat lamp! So who da daddy be?

Ermac: Bonificaca's daddy is a man called Jax!

Female caller 2: Can you be mo percise? I don't remember people names once we don fucced.

Ermac:(sighs) His name is Jackson Briggs. He is a high ranking officail in Special Forces branch of the army and resides in Dallas Texas. He is black, has brown eyes, is bald, muscular about 6'7" and enjoys watching broadway musicals.

Meanwhile at Special Forces headquarters...

Jax:(watching the infomercial) DAMN YOU ERMAC!

Kenshi:(nursing the concussion given to him by Sonya) Can you keep it down? I have a headache.

Back on the infomercial...

Female caller 2: Oh thank yu Mista Ermac! And Jax if yu listen yu betta git ready to pay me an feed my baby muthafucka!

Johnny decided to leave before he was late for his shoot. But he had to admit that it was funny. He finnally found his set and had a seat in the chair with his name on it. He was suppose to play the roll of Girch Gunder, European, Metrosexual crime boss. The other star was playing Dragon, a young kid who joins Gunder's organization, only only to extract revenge and kill Gunder. Just then the star who will play Dragon entered.

Cage: Well, well. If it isn't...

Who is co-star in Cages movie? Find out next chapter!


	4. Movie Trailers and Strip Clubs

Disclaimer: I don't own Mortal Kombat, Street Fighter, or Harrison Ford

It was a day after what Stryker, Jax, and Cyrax refered to as "The Incident".And once again, there they sat,bored out of thier mnds. And to make it worse, Jax was mortified by the fact that he had a child!

"Hey guys?" Stryker said

"Yeah?" the other two answered

"Wanna see a movie?"

"Oh hell no! Everytime you pick a movie it goes wrong! You said (in a mocking tone) 'Hey guys let's go see Daredevil.' Worst 2 hours of my life!"

"What about the time you suggested we see'Gigli'?" Cyrax said

"Or that time you asked to watch a porno and we saw..." Jax began

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Stryker and Cyrax yelled in unison

"Oh yeah. Sorry. But like I said you can't pick movies." Jax said

"Well then can I suggest something?" Cyrax asked

"Why not Raxxy?" Stryker said

"How about we see Peter Jackson's remake of King Kong. It stars Jack Black and Adrian Brody."

"All right. It looks like it might be good." Jax said

"Any movie with Jack Black and a giant monkey sounds good to me." Stryker said with a smile

"Excellant. Let us go." Cyrax said. He then pressed a button on his arm panel and transformed into his alternate costume from Deadly Aliance to appear more human.

All three men crowded into Jax's Hummer and drove to the nearest theather. After a heated(and if it wasn't for Cyrax violent) argument about who is going to pay for snacks was settled by the fact that they get them free because they are in the military, they made they way to there seats. A trailer for an upcoming movie played.

The announcer began "Coming soon to a theather near you.! For his entire life, Lee Majori was known only as Dragon. He was always a great martial artist and a kind man. But when a European ganster kills his father, he must avenge him. This is the theatrical event of the century, as two of the greatest martial arts actors of all time star in "Dragon's Vengenage" Starring Johnny Cage as Girch Gunder and Hong Kong action legend Fei Long as Dragon! Cage, Long, Dragon's Vengenance."

"When will that jackass stop making movies?" Jax asked as he ate his popcorn

"When someone kills him." Stryker responded

"If it involves him never making another movie, I offer to do it." Cyrax said

The next trailer was even worse.

"In a time were technology of the future and past have merged into one, there lives a man. Once a high ranking military official, he was killed to insure he did not leak secrets he had stumbled upon.. But he survived. And now he wants revenge. Because he is..."The Savage"! Starring Harrison Ford as the head of the military. And introducing Kano as the Savage!"

At seeing this Stryker spat out his soda and Jax threw down his popcorn.

"Man fuck it! After those shitty trailers, I'm not even in the mood to see this movie." Jax said

After this he stormed out of the building with Cyrax and Stryker close behimd. He got in the car with the others and drove down the street.

"Where are we going?" Cyrax asked

"There!" Jax said

He pointed to a large pink building that read "Kitty Kennel". Jax went inside and the other two followed.

The club was full of women wearing nothing but stockings, high heels, cat ears, and tails.

After a few minutes in the bar, the lights went dark. And the DJ came over the loud speaker.

The DJ came over the loudspeaker "Allright fellas, it's the moment you've all been waiting for todays featured vixen; Blood Lust!"

Then red light filled the room as Nitara came from under the stage, completly naked, covered in fake blood, rubbing all over herself.

"You gotta be kidding me." Jax said

"This is hot." Stryker said

"Say what?"

Stryker repeated himself only louder this time "This is hot!"

"You are one seriously fucked up guy" Jax said

"THIS IS FUCKING HOT!!" Stryker screamed as he ripped his clothes off

He then rushed the stage and started doing weird and unmentionable things with Nitara.

"Hey, you have to pay for that!" Nitara said

Jax: then turned to Cyrax "Can you belive this guy?"

He then looks over to see Cyrax recording the entire event with his camcorder feature.

"This is hot." Cyrax chimed

Jax then left, leaving Cyrax to peel Stryker off of Nitara and bail him out of jail for indicent exposure.


	5. Mug shots and Hooters

'Wow, I live in a really beutiful realm' Sindel thought to herself from her throne room which had a balcony that overlooked the Edenia. But something was wrong. Something was not as it should be. After a moment, Kitana and Jade entered the room.

"Mother, what troubles you?" Kitana asked

"Something is...missing." Sindel responded

Soon after she said this, Rain came running into the room at a neckbreaking pace. He was very sweaty and out of breath.

"What's the rush Purple Boy?" Jade asked

"I have urgent news!" Rain said

"Then out with it already!" Jade shouted

Rain then stood straight up and looked directly into the camera "The author of this fanfic does not own Mortal Kombat or anything mentoined in this fanfic. Is that what was missing?"

"Yes it was. Thank you Rain. I feel much better now" Sindel responded

"Now that that's out of the way, we can restart this chapter!" Kitana said

The sound of a tape rewinding is heard as the scene flips back to when Sindel was looking from the balcony

Anyway, Sindel stood overlooking her balocny, Kitana and Jade walk in blah blah blah. Just then Rain ran in and fell to the ground laughing.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Jade asked

Rain continued to laugh as he pulled out a small remote from his attire and pointed it towards the wall.He pressed a button that caused the the wall to saperate and expose a huge television. To herself, Sindel pondered how Rain got a remote to the royal T.V. On the screen, large Shokan and a Tarkatan sat in a news studio, both wearing suits.

"I'm Mark Quad." said the Shokan

"And I'm Joe Slasher. This your Multi-Realm update." the Tarkatan said

"What's so humorous about the news?" Kitana asked

"Just wait!" Rain said, quickly shushing her

"Now we go to Bob Hu-man who is on location in Earthrealm where three former Mortal Kombat participants were arrested. Bob?"

"Thanks Mark. I'm here outside the Special Forces headquarters where a high ranking official and former Mortal Kombat fighter has been taken into custody. Officers tell me that earlier today Kurtis Stryker was arrested for attacking a performer at the Kitty Kennel strip club. They also arrested a cyborg known simply as "Cyrax" for illegally recording the event. When asked why he did, Mr. Stryker said quote 'It's was Jax's idea.' After that, officers came here and arrested Jackson "Jax" Briggs for conspiracy of assault. The three suspects are shown here."

The screen flashed to the mugshots of the three Special Forces members. All three looked as if they needed to be shaved(yes even Cyrax), Jax's eyes were redder than Ermac's costume, and Stryker's unusually curly hair almost fromed an afro(like Justin Guarini from the first season of American Idol) and he was still soaked in fake blood(though some of it was real from when Nitara stabbed him). Cyrax, however, was rusted beyond belief.

The screen then goes back to the studio where Joe and Mark are laughing their asses off.

"Humans are so pathetic!" Mark said threw laughing

"Yes, but their flesh is quite tasty." Joe said

"So I've heard. So I've heard." Mark said with a smile

With that Rain pressed the same button he had earlier and the T.V. returned to its spot in the wall.

"Did you see that?" Rain said threw laughing

Sindel found it quite humorous, Kitana laughed slightly and shook her head, but Jade thought its was funnier than Rain did.

At The Wu Shi Academy

Shujinko, Kai, Kung Lao, Liu Kang, and Bo Rai Cho had all been watching the same thing.

"Damn..." Kai said shaking his head

"Have you ever seen three worse mug shots?" Bo Rai Cho asked.

"Maybe Nick Nolte. And that's a big maybe." Kung Lao said

"Anyway, we should go some where to celebrate the success of our commercials." Liu Kang said

"I know! Hooters!" Shujinko said

Liu Kang had a puzzled look on his face "There's a Hooters in China?"

"There's a Hooters everywhere my chosen friend." Kai said

"No no no! Let's have them deliver! I heard they send a chick in the Hooters uniform there on roller blades!" Kung Lao said

"Excellant!" Shujinko said in a very Mr. Burns like way

"Let's order an ass load of food! That way, they'll have to send two girls!" Bo Rai Cho exclaimed.

Liu Kang bowed to Bo Rai Cho "Master Bo Rai Cho, you're wisdom is greater than even Lord Raiden's"

"I heard that!" Raiden's voice boomed threw the room.

"Sorry Raiden, it's true." Liu Kang said

So the Shaolin Monks quickly ordered about 300 worth of food and stood outside and awaited the delivery girls arrival. After a while they saw two girls roller blade their way over the horizen. As the two came up the steps they were exposed to be Li Mei and Kira.

" 294:22. Cash only. Oh shit! Not you guys!" Li Mei said as she reconized the monks

"What? The deliviery was a to a martial arts academy. Who else whould it be?" Liu Kang asked

"Could've been those guys from Tekken."

"What the hell is a Tekken?" Shujinko asked

"Just shut up and give us the money." Kira said

"Pay them Kai...Kai?" Bo Rai Cho said

Kai was in a trance staring at Li Mei's Clevege(yes it is so amazing the C gets caps) He was starting to drool insanely.

"KAI!!" the other four monks scremaed

At this Kai snapped out of it . He reached into his wallet and pulled out 5 hundred dollar bills.

"Here you go." Kai said in a smooth voice as he gave three of the bills. " And heres a little something for yourself baby."

He put the remaining bills in her top and gave her a slap on the ass.He then wagged his tounge at her. Li Mei grabbed his tounge and raised one of her scys in the air and was about to stab him in his tounge until Kira stopped her.

"Don't! Mileena will take his medical payments out your check if he sues." Kira said

Li Mei sighed "Your right."

The two then skated of into the distance.

"Look at that ass!" Kai said with a smile

Li Mei then turned around and shot a Sparkler blast at him, causing him to catch fire.

"I'm on fire, I'm on fire!!"

Back at the Edenian Palace

As Rain, Sindel, Kitana, and Jade stood talikng in the throne room when four small daggers flew at them. The turned around to see Hsu Hao.

"What do you want'?" Sindel asked

"The Red Dragon was hired to kill you four! The mission was chosen for me!" Hus Hao said with glee.

Jade smirked. "So your suppose to kill us?"

"Yes!"

"All four of us?" Rain asked

"Yeah!" Hsu Hao said with less confidence

Kitana began looking around "By yourself?"

It seemed that all of the confidence Hsu Hao had left was gone.

There was a long silence.

"I really should have thought this out better." Hsu Hao said

"Yeah you should have" Sindel said as she and other four Edenians drew weapons

"Oh shit..."


	6. Fusions and More Pain for Kenshi

"Greetings, I am Shang Tsung."

"And I'm Quan Chi."

"And we are (dramatic music) THE DEADLY ALLIANCE!" both said in unison

"Ghost Zero owns many things." Quan Chi said

"However, he doesn't own Mortal Kombat or any of it's charecters." Shang Tsung said

"That's right, Midway does."

"No one owns me!" Shang Tsung proclaimed.

Quan Chi snickered slightly "Liu Kang sure owned your ass in the first tournement"

"You bastard!" Shang Tsung said as he lunged at Quan Chi

"BRING IT BITCH!!" Quan Chi said as he took a fighting stance.

As the Deadly Alliance fought, Dark Raiden enters, and shock both of them until there nothing but piles of ash..

"Start the chapter!" the dark Thunder God commanded. "Oh yeah, he don't own Dragonball Z or anything else mentioned in this fic either."

Sonya and Kenshi drove in her van, with the recently bailed out Stryker, Cyrax, and Jax in the back seats, there heads hung low in shame.

"What the hell were you thinking? Do you know I had to baill you out with my own money." Sonya said.

"Hey it was my money!" Kenshi said.

"SHUT UP!" Sonya said as she smacked Kenshi with a Kali Stick "Anyway, why would you attack her Stryker?"

"I was horn..."

"QUIET!" Sonya said as she smacked Stryker as well "And Jax why did you plan it?"

Jax sounded very offened "Hell no! It was my idea to go to the clu..."

"DON'T TALK WHILE I'M TALKING!" as you may have guessed, Jax got smacked "And Cyrax, why did you record it?

"I've been unable to have sex since I became a cyborg. It's the most action I've had in years." Cyrax said sadly

"Oh you poor baby!" Sonya said in a motherly tone

"Why don't I get sympathy? I'm blind!" Kenshi whined

Sonya smacked him twice with Kali Sticks." QUIET YOU BLIND DICK! Yes can I have the biggest cheeseburger you have?" she said. It was only then the others realised they were at a drive-thru burger joint.

Kenshi groggily sat up and asked "Can I have a..."

"WHY CAN'T YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP?!" Sonya screamed as she kicked him in the skull.

Kenshi passed out and started shaking

"Is that blood coming out of his ears?" Cyrax questioned

Stryker shrugged "Dunno. But he's defintely foaming at the mouth."

Jax: lifted Kenshi's eye wrap "Yep. His eyes rolled back in his head too. That can't be good."

Sonya calmly ignored the situation. "Damn! I forgot to get a drink. Wait here." She then went inside a local 7-11 to get a soda.

A few moments after, Kenshi recovered.

"You good man?" Stryker asked

Kenshi was clearly disoriented "Yeah I just need some food."

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

They all screamed this because Kenshi had devoured Sonya's burger in one bite and she saw the whole thing. She grab a wooden baseball bat(given to her by Havik, in an effort to cause Chaos) and went David Ortiz on Kenshi's head with all of her might.

At the Lin Kuei Headquarters in the mountains of China

"What the hell was that?" Sub-Zero asked

"I think it was a blonde army chick hitting a blind man in the head with a Loiusville Slugger for eating her burger." Frost said matter-of-factly.

"I KNOW THAT YOU IDIOT! DO YOU THINK I'M STUPID?!"

Frost stammered "I thought..."

"SHUT UP! SHUT THE HELL UP!" Sub-Zero shouted in rage

Frost began crying softly behind her mask

Sub-Zero composed himself "I meant that huge power level."

"What Power level?"

"DON'T MAKE ME HURT YOU!"

Frost was silent.

"I think it was him" Smoke sais as he pointed up

All three look up to see Super Buu from Dargonball Z

"I'm here to destroy you!" Buu screamed

Buu then flies toward them, only to be frozen and shattered by Frost .

Sub-Zero scoffed "Bout time you did something right."

"Sifu" Frost began "Ever since I tried to overthrow you, you've been acting...coldhearted towards me."

"Bad pun Frost" Smoke said as he began shaking his head .

After Smoke said that, Buu appeared behind Frost and absorbed her. He then became blue and was surrounded by frost and was wearing Frost's uniform.

"Yes! Fear my power!" "Frost Buu" said

"Smoke, I need you put on this earring for me." Sub-Zero said as he tossed him a legendary Potara earring.

"Kay!" the suddenly Human Smoke says with glee "What does this do?"

"Fuses us into one being forever." Sub-Zero said under his breathe.

"Cool! Wait, it does what?"

Sub-Zero quickly put on the other earring.Their bodies crashed together. When the smoke cleared, a new warrior stood. He was surrounded by icy mist and smoke. His attire was blue and gray.

"We are Smoke-Zero, the ultimate Lin Kuei fusion. Feel our icy smokey wrath!"

Buu and Smoke-Zero battled fiercly until

"We can't win." Smoke-Zero said to himself, or themselves rather. "But we have a strategy to defeat him thanks to Sub-Zero's unhealhty anime additction. Eat this Pinky!

Buu devoured the piece of chocolate thrown his way. If only he had known it was chocolate laxaitve. His stomach turned for several mintues until, well lets not sugarcoat it, he took a huge shit, freeing Frost

"Yes it worked! Are you allright Frost?"

Frost stood there, mortified and in shock of what she was covered in. Smoke-Zero took this chance to quickly kill Buu.

"Great, now how do we turn back?"

"You can't." Frost said

"How do you know:"

"I do watch DBZ ya know." Frost said, still traumatized from being crapped out.

Just then Ermac came out of nowhere and killed Smoke-Zero with his axe.

"What was that for?" the frozen Frost asked

"We are the only ones who can talk as more than one person in this series. We had to eliminate him."

"Whatever. I'm going to go take a shower."

"Can we watch?"

"Sure."

"Score one for us!"

A/N: Well this ends the most pointless and by far worse chapter of the story. So what if it's crap? IT'S MY STORY AND I'LL MAKE IT AS HORRIBLE AS I SEE FIT! MWAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHA! The story will gain what little sanity it had next chapter I promise.


	7. Conventions and Ghostbusters

Disclaimer: I don't own a thing. Not even myself(sobs)

Kabal's job sucked. Point black plain and simple. Kira made hundreds a day from tips at Hooters. Kano just did a 7 figure movie deal. And Jarek and Kobra...well Kabal didn't want to think about what they did, but they made a pretty penny doing it. Or should he say each other. And he was here. At the Santa Monica Geekdom Convention and he was suppose to be, you guessed it! Darth Vader! And to make it worse, he had to work with this idiot Moloch who was playing Chewbacca.

Like I said, his job sucked. They didn't even provide a fake lightsaber. They just told him to paint his hooksword red! So here he was surrounded by geeks and nerds from all over California. He then noticed some dork in a Darth Maul suit staring at him like they knew each other. He then noticed the guy had two red painted hookswords put together for his dual ended lightsaber. The man tryed to walk off, but Kabal caught him.

"Mavado?" Kabal asked.

"Shoosh! I can't have people knowing I come here!" Mavado said "It would ruin recruiting.

"I see. I know how hard it is to find good recruits. Wait a second! I hate you!" Kabal said angerly

He then hopped on a nearby table with a megaphone and started yelling

"Mavado, leader of the Red Dragon Clan, is a geek like you people! Join the Black Dragon so you can work for me! I'm so col, I don't even belong here."

The opposite of what he wanted happened. The geeks, feeling the can relate to him, crowded Mavado and many joined the Red Dragon.

"Damn! How could that backfire?" Kabal said sourly

"Even I could have told you that wouldn't work" Moloch said (A/N:I think he can talk. Who cares?)

"Shut up."

Outside on the street walked a sad man. A sad man named Havik. Why was he so sad? He hadn't been able to cause any Chaos! Sure he did some minor things, but nothing big time. And it's not like it's hard to cause Chaos in Earthrealm, he did many times. Just look at his resume:

Havik's Chaos Resume:

1. Telling Tommy Hilfinger to hit Axl Rose

2.Helping George W. Bush get elected

3.Introducing Bill Clinton and Monica Liwenski

4.Starting the Black Eye Peas

5.Telling Johnny Cage he should act

6.Telling Keanu Reaves to act.

7.Telling Ryan Leaf he should play football

8.The Oakland Raiders

9.Introducing Pacman Jones to the wonders of strip clubs.

10.Teaching Zinedine Zidane how to headbutt

11.Mortal Kombat 4

12.The N-Gage

13.Mortal Kombat: Special Forces

14.Telling Sadaam to hide in a spider hole and that the U.S. wouldn't find him.

15.Helping Arnold become Governor.

16.Devil May Cry 2

17.Telling Jose Canseco to write a book.

18.Telling Kobra to join Mortal Kombat because he would be a fan favorite

He then saw a T.V. anchor say the America had an election coming up for President.

"Shouldn't that be like next two years or something?" Havik asked. But then he figured to not think to much of it as it was adding to the Chaos.

"Wait! Chaos, President, this year, America. Dammit I have a plan!" Havik scream

Havik then ran off laughing crazily, almost crashing into Ashrah who was going into a nearby house. Her outfit was covered with pics of Noob Saibot and a red X threw his face.

"Thank goodness! There everywhere!" the man inside said

"No problem. That will be 799.99." Ashrah said

"What?? I can't afford that!" the man exclaimed

"Well then I guess I should go."

"Wait! I write a check just get them out!" the frustrated man said

"Okay. Let's begin." Ashrah said as she pulled out her Kriss "Come out you bastard!"

The song 'Thriller' by Michael Jackson starts playing and Noob Saibot and many copies of him come out and start doing the Thriller dance. After a while, they stop and Noob starts talking.

"Why are you here Ashrah? You're never gonna stop me. Hee! A chomone! Ha!(A/N Those are Michael Jackson noices in case you couldn't figure it out)

"Look, don't make me go Deception on your ass"

"Chamone! Try it bitch! Cause I'm a...Ha...yes I am...Who...A smotth criminal!Hee hee!"

Ashrah takes her Kriss and easily kills Noob, beofre putting him in on those Ghostbuster traps.

"My money sir." she said

"Okay. Here's your check."

"Sorry, I don't accept checks." Ashrah said calmly as she took the check

"But you said I could use a check!"

"No, I said 'Okay. Let's begin' I never said that was acceptable. I want cash.!" she exclaimed as she brandished her Kriss

" Fine! Take it! Just give me my check back." the man screamed

"It's my check now. Consider it payment for wasting my time."

Ashrah then leaves the poor man broke and frightened.

Meanwhile, Havik hade put his plan of chaos into motion. He is now standing in front of some men we can't see.

"Look, you five are really tough and stuff, and you all have chaotic ideas, so I want you to run for office. Now the Really Deadly Alliance, go forth and cause CHOAS!!" Havik screamed into the night.

In the Red Dragon HQ

Hsu Hao sat in boxers, in his bed, eating an industrial size tub of Orange Sherbat, recovring from his beating. He had been sliced, stabbed, hammered, blugeoned, and overall got his ass handed to him Edenian style. Stupid Mavado. Why couldn't he take the Ededian mission? After some sulking, Hao decided to watch some T.V. An ad for a rap C.D. came on

The Announcer began "You've seen white people acting black.You've seen black people acting white. Now see a Native American acting white acting black! That's right! Poser records presents MC Dark Dog!"

The screen shows Nightwolf, wearing baggy jeans, a jersey with Dark Dog on the back. He has on a pair of shades and a platnium dog collar and he has a grill.

"CD includes his hit song Trilogy!"

"Trilogy! Trilogy! That mean 1 2 3! Ermac, Scorpian, Rain and even me! Kicken ass taken names, even Kintaro came to bring the pain." Nightwolf rapped

"Word!" Kintaro said as he appeared from nowhere and struck a b-boy stance.

"And now with a song featuring Kung Lao!"

Kung Lao is shown wearing blue jeans, no shirt(trying to get the sexy man look) a giant Platnium MK dragon chain and a baseball cap lined with blades like his battle hat.

"Yea! I'm Kung Lao!"

"Who!?"

"Kung Lao!"

"Who!?"

"Kung Lao!"

"Who!?"

This continues for the end of the ad. Hsu Hao quickly wrote down the phone number for the CD. He hoped Mavado liked it cause that's his birthday gift.

On the next episode(or chapter or whatever), we will discover the identity of the Really Deadly Alliance!!


	8. Urgent messages and Politics

Ghostzero: (dressed like a pimp)Where's my money woman!

Tanya: I ain't got it daddy!

Ghostzero:What!(pulls out machete) Does Ghostzero have ot slice a bitch?

Tanya: Don't! I'll call the cops!

Ghostzero: Call em woman! I own you!

Tanya: No you don't! Midway does! And they own all other Mortal Kombat charecters!

Ghostzero:(remembers that)Damn! Well then I'll just kill you!(chases her) Get the fuck back here!

Tanya:Ahh!

Ghostzero: Start the damn chapter!

Darrius stood in his local Circuit City, which was in a whole another realm. He made a memo to himself to build one in Seido when he takes over. He had come here to get a PSP. He really wanted to see it was worth all the hype. Just then on the big display T.V., a campaign commercial came on.

Shao Kahn: Greetings mortals, I am Shao Kahn! Are you displeased with the way America is being lead? Well then get out and vote...FOR ME! That's right! I am running for President of your puny nation along with my Vice President Shang Tsung. MY Secreatery of Defense Quan Chi! My Secreatary of State Shinnok! And my Director of Homeland Security Onaga! And these are my campaign managers Baraka and Reptile!

Baraka and Reptile: Vote Kahn or DIE!

This ad was paid for by Shao Kahn, ruler of Outworld.

Darrius shoke his head. He hated to imagine that regime. As he was walking out with his game he was passed by a frantic Rain, who was wearing a purple t-shirt and blue jeans, but stiil had on the mask.

Rain: I need a video camera! Now!

Store employee:Why?

Rain: Me and my girlfreind are about to do some...taping. Just gimme the damn camera!

Tanya: You better hurry up before I change my mind.

Rain:(pulls out Shao Kahn's hammer and knocks the guy into oblivion.) I need a fucking camera! Somebody please!

Store Manager: Here you go sir. That'll be 199.99

Rain gave the man a bag full of Edenian coins, took the camera and ran off.

Manager: How the hell do you spend this?

Back at the Edenian Castle

Rain and Tanya are laying in bed, sweaty, naked and out of breath. The new camera was broken already.

Rain: Didn't I say that would be fun?

Tanya: Yea...

Rain: Maybe next time we can...

Just then they notice Scorpian standing in their bedroom.

Rain & Tanya:WHAT THE HELL!

Scorpian:(hands a letter to Rain) Urgent message for Rain.

Scorpian then left as fast as he had appeared.

Tanya: What does it say?

At the Shaolin Temple

Kai was just about to finish his shrine to Li Mei when...

Scorpian: Urgent message for Kai(gives him letter)

at Goro's Castle

Goro is chasing a naked Sheeva.

Goro: Come to Goro!

Scorpian: Urgent message for Sheeva.

Sheeva covered herself with three of her arms and took the letter with the fourth

Goro: How dare you look at my 3rd wife's nude body!

He charges Scorpian only to be knocked out with one hit.

at the Outworld Gym

Reiko is having a benchpressing contest with some mullet guy when...

Scorpian: Letter for Reiko

Reiko: The hell...

at a probation meeting

Stryker is pretending ot listen to his Probation Officer when...

Scorpian: Stryker! I got a letter for you.

Stryker: Sweet!

at a car shop

Sektor: I need an oil change.

Scorpian: I have this for you machine.

At a campaign meeting for Kahn

Scorpian: Take this Shinnok.

Shinnok: this better be worth my time

at Jarek's movie set

Scorpian: Stop it dammit! I have this message for you.

Jarek:(wiping nasty fluids from his face) Thanks.

Why did these guys get letters? Find out in the final chapter of Life After Mortal Kombat!


	9. Shokan Dominatrix and Seidan RentACops

Disclaimer: In case you haven't noticed after 8 chapies, I don't own a damn thing.

The scene is one of a courtroom. Every single MK fighter is in attendance except for the ones who recieved letters. Everyone is chattering until the announcer and theme from the 'People's Court' begins.

Announcer:(as Fujin,Shinnok,Reiko,Jarek,Kai,Sheeva,Rain,Stryker,and Sektor enter the courtroom) this the Plantiff, Fujin the Wind God. He claims that the Defendant unlawfully fired him and all the other stars of the acclaimed Mortal Kombat series. He is claiming that do to the fact that he and several other warriors were not included in the newer installments of the game it sold poorly causing thier termination. He is sueing for his job back.

This is the defendant Ed Boon. He is claiming that the warriors in question were not popular, and probaly would have worsened sales for the games. He is countersuing for 10,000 dollars.

"All rise. Now residing, the Honorable Judge Lord Raiden." Scorpion said while wearing a really small bailiff outfit

"Here come the Judge! Here come the Judge! Everybody know that here come the Judge!" Kenshi chatted lifelessly.

Sonya then took Jade's Bojustu and hit him in the head.

"Don't ever grab my weapon again service wench" Jade growled (A/N: No idea how I came up with the term service wench, but it fits as the perfect insult)

"Or what jewel whore?" Sonya said with a bit of challenge in her voice.

"Maybe you two should settle your differances in a pool of gravy." Jax suggested

"And maybe you should do it naked..." Kung Lao added.

"And maybe Li Mei, Kira, Frost, and Nitara should join in to even the score.." Kai said dreamingly

"And you should kiss and make up afterwards..." Stryked uttered as he rubbed his hand togethers.

Jade then hit all four with her staff

Stryker fell on the ground and, upon realizing Jade is wearing a drees, promtly slides under her skirt "I see London, I see France, Jade's not wearing under...ACK!!"

The gagging sound came from Jade jamming the staff down his throat.

"Order! Order dammit! I demand order!!" Raiden said as he bang his Thunder Hammer like a gavel.

"NEVER!!Chaos rules! Order drools!!" Havik said with glee

"Speaking of Order, wheres Hotaru?" Frost questioned.

"Are you fucking stupid?!" Sub-Zero snapped "Why would you want him here? Didn't you play Deception?"

"Sorry Sifu! I forgot who badly he owned you at the end."

"Hey! I did not get owned by anyone! Ever!"

Kitana scoffed "That's a lie."

"Yeah shes right.You always get owned." Cage added.

":No I don't!"

"Yeah you do." Kabal said as he pulled down a chart and started pointing with the Hooksword "Let's reveiw. In MK1 Scorpian owned and killed your punk ass."

"That was Noob!" Subby said in his defense. "I'm a different Sub-Zero!"

"Hee! He's tellin the truth, Chamone ah hee hee!"

"Well too bad!" kabal snapped back "Who told you to take your brothers name anyway? Like you couldn't call yourself Artic or something. It's counts against you! moving on. In MK2, you get owned by Scorpion. the only reason he didn't kill you is because he killed your bro. In MK3, you got owned by the Lin Kuei, which is where I'm assuming you got that nifty eye scar."

"Yeah let's go with that." Sub-Zero said as his eyes shifted.

Flashback

It's shows Sub-Zero before he had his scar. He is tied to a bed with a Shokan dominatrix standing next to him with four whips in hand.

"You like that don't you bitch?!" the Shokan growled.

"Yes ma'am." Sub-Zero whimpered

The Shokan whipped him across the eye, causing the scar in question.

present time

"Ha! I told you he was into that S&M shit! Pa up honey!" Cage yelled in victory

Sonya pulls out some money and hands it to Cage.

An evil smile crept across his face "Thats not what we betted..." he chimed in a sing song tone.

Sonya sighs angerly and raises her shirt so that only Cage can see before lowering it again.

"Yes!! Go Cage!" he yelled with gusto

"How could you see my flashback in the frist place?" Sub-Zero questioned.

"I did it. threw the glorius power of Chaos and such." Havik said calmly.

"Ahem, back to my chart." Kabal said as everyone's attention returned to him. "You got owned by Scorpian yet again in MK4, he didn't kill you then because you told him who killed his clan. In Deadly Alliance, you got owned by Frost."

"Oh come on! We didn't even fight!"

"I know. She made you sad when she froze herself, thus she got you with the rare Emotional Ownage. And finally, you got owned by Hotaru by in Deception and would be dead if it weren't for Kenshi. "

Scorpion quickly turns to camera "For those who can't tell, the author is not a Sub-Zero fan"

Kabal then sat back down after his amazing display of pointing things out.

"Why hasn't anyone answered me? Where is Hotau?"

"Why do you wanna know?" Smoke asked.

"Way I look at it, I'm stuck here so he should be here too."

"Last I heard he got a job as a cop somewhere." Baraka said.

"Really?" Styrker asked.

"Yeah, Dairou too. Apparently thier time in the Seidan Guard help them get a pretty high rank. That's why they aren't here." Baraka informed.

The scene changes to a mall. There we see Hotaru in a Rent-A-Cop uniform fussing at some kids.

"Order! Order I say you little infidels!" an enraged Hotaru yells.

"Screw you!" the kid yells

"Yeah screw you raw!" his buddy seconds.

"Why you little..."

Just then Dairou comes down from the sky wearing the same uniform as Hotaru and starts doing multiple sword techniques and combos on the children. He then realizes that the kids were unharmed.

"You are quite strong to survive such an attack." Dairou says slowly

"Dude, you tryed to kill us with a flashlight." one of the kids pointed out.

Dairou then notices that being a Rent-A-Cop, he wasn't given a weapon. The kids laughed uncontrolably.

"I need not my blade to vanquish you fools!"

He then does the Tombstone Drop on top of one boy smashing him into pieces. He then perform his Fatality where he smashes your head on the other kid.

"You see, thats why you got put out the Seidan Guard. You have a horrible temper. " Hotaru said as he rubbed his temples.

Dairou suddenly felt a wave of regret "What have I done?! I don't decerve to live!!" He then performs his Hara-Kiri, which is still in my opinon the most disturbing thing in MK history, leaving behind a disturbed Hotaru.

Back at court

"Order God dammit! ORDER IN THE COURT!" Raiden yelled with authority.

"Don't listen to him! Let Chaos rule!!" Havik(who else?) said.

At this point Raiden had heard enough. He took his hammer and sent Havik flying into the screen like on MK4. He then chated something and lightning struck Havik, turning him into a pile of ashes.

"Anybody else want some?" A charged (no pun inteneded) Raiden asked.

"Ha! That wasn't that impressive!" Quan Chi scoffed.

"GET OVER HERE!!" Scorpion said as he speared Quan Chi and launched him into orbit.

With the destractions gone, Raiden took his stand. Finally, the trial could start.

A/N:Wow! I actually made a whole chapter out of this scene! Looks like you'll to wait for chapter 10 after all! The end is near...


	10. MK Movies and Courtrooms

Disclaimer: I own nothing dammit!

The last time we saw the gang they were in court. Fujin and some of the less popular charecters are sueing Ed Boon for firing them.

"Let's get this started shall we? I have an appointment with my bookie at 3 and Joey Numbers doesn't like for me to be late.Now" Raiden pasued to put on a pair of huge glasses and look at some papers "It appears you are being sued by these loser for canning them. Care to defend yourself?"

"Sure Raiden. I had to..." Boon was cut off.

"Bailiff" Raiden said calmly

"That's 'Your Honor' to you, bitch." Scorpion said with a spear to Boon's neck.

"Thank you Scorpin"

"Of course." Boon said nervously. "Your Honor, I had to fire them and you all. My hands were tied"

"I object!" Fujin declared.

"You can't. This is small claims court." Raiden pointed out. "Continue" he said.

"With what? I said what all I had to say."

At that moment, the court was treated to the sight of Quan Chi returning to the area with a crash due to Scorpion's uppercut

"Anyway. I will now call Reiko to the stand." Raiden said

"You can't dumb ass!" Shang Tsung said mockingly "This is small claims court."

"Bailiff..."

Scorpian then set Shang Tsung on fire with a fireball.

Over the next seven hours, all the plantiffs testified as the others slept. Until...

"I now call Sheeva to the stand." Raiden said

"Oh boy." Boon's lawyer said lowly.

"What?" his client asked

"Kai is the next person to take the stand"

"And?" Boon asked.

"Do you know how convincing he is?"

"No, perhaps a flashback of a real life event will sway my thinking."

"Kay!" the lawyer said as a flashback insued.

Flashback

The scene is of a courtroom in California. The judge begins speaking.

"Will the defendant please rise? In the case of the People vs Orenthall James Simpson, the jury finds the Defendant gui...(someone hands him a paper) Oh. It appears that the jury has a new verdict. And that verdict is ...not guilty?"

O.J. Simpson cheers with glee.

"I told you he was not guilty" Kai said to the jury.

"Yeah. When you put it like that the evidence sounds pretty silly" one juror commented.

Present day

"Damn..." Boon declared. "We need to do something.I know! Li Mei come here. We need you to do us a favor."

"What is it?" Li Mei asked. Boon then whispered the rest to her. "No frickin way"

"C'mon! If you do it I'll set you up with your crush." Boon said in a tone that would work perfectly on a child.

"Really?"

"Scouts honor."

Li Mei let out a sigh. "Fine."

After three more hours of Sheeva's testimony, it was Kai's turn.

"I now call Kai Lotus to the stand." Raiden proclaimed.

Nothing happens...

"I said I now call Kai to the stand."

Still nothing...

"Dammit Kai get you ass here now!"

With that Kai and Li Mei re enter the courtroom. Kai is adjusting his pants and Li Mei is fixing her shirt.

"Sorry Lord Raiden. I was kinda caught up. We were just groping and kissing and touching, you know that kind of thing."

"Screw that! How was it man?" Bo Rai Cho asked

"Was it everything I dreamed it would be?" Kung Lao asked

"Did she do things to make you wanna cry?" Jax inquired.

Kai blushed "I just can't say. I don't kiss and tell"

"Well you waited too long to come to the stand so now any testimony I get from you will be held in contempt or something." Raiden said.

"Phew. Good, because I was really worried about taking the stand. I'm not very convincing ya know."

"What do you mean? You single handedly changed the outcome of the OJ case right?" Boon asked.

"Nope. I have a cousin that claims to have been their, but that's about it."

"But I saw the flashback!" Boon whined.

Kai shrugged. "Don't know what to tell ya guy."

"But that means..." Boon turned to his lawyer "You lied to me you idiot!

"Oops. My bad." the lawyer said.

"You suck as a lawyer! What's your name? I'll make sure you never get a another case!"

"My name is Ed Boon..."

And this was not a dumb attempt to confuse Boon. The lawyer was Ed Boon. How you ask? Boon had decided to defend himself and had been talking to himself for the past few hours.

"So that's why they were staring at me like that..." Boon thought aloud.

"Excuse me? Remember our deal?" Li Mei asked.

"What? Oh yeah jus tell him how you feel. He won't turn you down"

"You mean he loves me too?"

"No. He just wants some..."

"Oh. We'll that will do. Come here you!" Li Mei then jumps on Scorpion.

They then have the most bizarre make out session in history which ends with a unmasked Scorpian(yes skull face and all) and a topless Li Mei leaving to go into the Judges personal chambers.

"Ooooookay...Subbie your my new baliff" Raiden said.

"Sweet! Shit is finally looking up for the Lin Kuei!" Sub-Zero says.

"Shouldn't you get someone who can fight?" Cage inquired.

"Your right. Zero your fired.Cage your in."

"Kick ass." Cage says as he puts on the baliff outfit.

"OK, moving on." Raiden began.

"Your honor? I do have something to contribute." Kai said.

"You do realize it's not gonna affect the outcome of the trial right?"

"Yep."

Raiden sighed. "Carry on."

"I have only this to say; I WAS ROBBED!! I'm a monk, yet I wasn't in Shaolin Monks. I wasn't even in Deadly Alliance OR Deception. Like Drahmin and Tanya were even needed. I wouldv'e been far better"

Scorpion the sticks his head out of the door back into view. "As you can see, the author is a big Kai Lotus fan." Scorpion then went back to his Li Mei make-out session.

"Okay. I now call Shinnok to the stand. Now Shinnok, tell me what you have to say about this bullshit." Raiden said.

"Certainly son." Shinnok responded.

"Your not my father." Raiden responded.

"Of course you are. Haven't you seen that second MK movie?"

Raiden blinked "I didn't know they made a sequel."

"Then watch with me."

Raiden and the other kombatants watched the movie(actually, Shinnok was the only kombatant to ever see the movie) in it's entirety. Comments like "She fuckin killed us! That never happened!" "Wow, I look great as a mortal." "Who is that babe playing Sonya?" "Who is that dork playing Raiden?" "Is that Jason from Young Hercules?" "What the hell! I'm not Asian!" "That's what I'm talkin bout! Muddy Kombat!" " Haha! Did you see what I did to Rain? What a dick!" "Whoa. Pretty spinning. I wanna do that in the next game! Look how cool I look doing that" "I am not a part of Ermac!" (A/N: If you can guess who said what in that last little sequence, send me a note saying so.)

"DADDY!!" Raiden and Shao Khan say as they bumrush their "father"

"See? Told you I was your father."

Then Scorpian and Li Mei came out of the room.

"What did I miss?" Scorpion asked.

"Raiden, Kahn, and Shinnok are having a family moment." Fujin informed him

"Family moment?"

"We'll explain later." Ermac said.

"Wait. Does it involve that crappy sequel movie?" Scorpion asked. Everyone nodded. "And they're just going to take that as canon?"

"Apparently so." Kung Lao said.

Liu Kang then walked over to Raiden and took his hammer and judge clothes as he cryed with his "family".

"Since Lord Raiden can't, I'll be judge.(reads papers on Raiden's desk.) Okay I now am suppose to call the jury, who has been watching backstage, will now come and give thier verdict. Come on out guys."

The jury was made some of the more...useless fighters in MK series; Meat, Chameleon, Khameleon, Mokap, Hornbuckle, and Blaze.

"Wow. You sir are one handsome man." Judge Liu said to Hornbuckle.

"Thank you. You're quite handsome yourself."

"Could it be because we look alike?"

"Why yes sir! That is it!"

Everyone looks at them strangely.

"Anyway" Liu began "Has the jury reached a verdict?"

"Yes your honor. We find the defendent Ed Boon guilty for unlawful firing."

All the kombatants yelled for joy.

"Order! order! Bailiff calm them down."

"Gotcha. Hey! Either calm down or I'll make you watch the Director's Cut of Ninja Mime with my commentary!"

Everyone went silent.

"Okay. I rule that you Ed Boon must hire us again and resume the Mortal Kombat series. That is all." Liu said as he got up

The scene warps to Stryker in a room with a bunch of 5th graders.

"And that's the story of how we got fired and hired again by Mortal Kombat. It also explains why I'm doing community service right now." Stryker said.

The bell rang and the students started filing out. One certain red headed kid stayed behind to ask a multitude of questions to Stryker. After a moment a women wearing only a cut off tanktop and very short shorts came in(it was the middle of July after all). It was none other than...

"Auntie Kira!!" the child exclaimed

"Hey kid. Ready to go...oh shit." Kira said.

"Auntie Kira huh? Well if that's the case get ready to meet Uncle Stryker."

"HELL NO!!"

Stryker then chased Kira while yelling things like "I love you" " Come back! Think about the kids we could make" and other things at her. It ended up with the police being called and Stryker being hauled off for indicent exposure, Attempted assault, and Parole Violation. He is currently serving a 12 year sentence.

FIN!!

"WAIT A DAMN MINUTE!!" Daegon said. "I don't even get a cameo?"

"Yeah, and what about me? What about Taven?!" Taven whined.

"It's not my fault your game came out after this story." the author says.

"But you re-wrote it! You could've penciled us in." Sareena said slowly.

"I could've, but I didn't, so yeah."

Again, FIN!!

A/N: Well thats it! The end of my story. Hope you guys liked it!


End file.
